muddi [he/him]

Sounds like you might enjoy people being honest to you rather than enjoying compliments or criticism. Criticism is more blunt when said to someone’s face, but compliments can seem disingenuous, so maybe you don’t believe the compliments subconsciously

Lucifer’s Hebrew name is Helel!

I once tripped hard and believed I died. When I came out from the trip, I still had no evidence I hadn’t finished tripping, and am actually still dying as my mind fires its dying circuits in my deathbed.

But that doubt interferes with my ability to live a normal live which I am used to and strive for, so I ignore the doubt, mostly. I check myself with little tests now and then.

Same with other existential doubts in general. If you want some official names of philosophies, Nagel’s absurdism, Buddhism, Vedanta, and maybe pragmatism would be applicable. Basically: don’t kill yourself with doubt, keep on living with some sensibility in your senses, though keep a curious mind to keep yourself in check now and then.

Ah yep that triggered the full memory for me…it was a book called Tikki Tikki Tempo: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tikki_Tikki_Tembo

Oh man this is stirring up some memories from early grade school about an English version of this that we used to sing about a boy with a long name and his younger brother.

I always wondered if that was just the moral of the story: don’t give your children long names. Which my parents did to me 😡

I think of it in terms of levels building on top of each other, or circles enveloping each other; also how I evaluate interviewees and new hires:

1. Finishes the task, but needs handholding
2. Finishes the task, figuring it out from docs, guides, and internet
3. Finishes the task, proactively trying to make sure it doesn’t return again as a bug or failing QA
4. Finishes the task, designing things in a way so that devs don’t need to put in extra effort in the future

In short, learning how to do something right, but also alternative strategies, how to pick the best option, and finally make sure you always end up with the right choice, or automatically do so, by design.

It’s at core a matter of experience, but taking on new opportunities and reading up helps to accelerate that.

I’ll check it out! Thanks for the rec

And about the Indian stories, I think you’ll find a rhythmic pattern. Maybe the translations can ruin it, I can’t confirm or deny this.

I think you’re right, I’m probably missing out on certain contexts and linguistic play reading the English translations. It adds to the melancholy in a way though, knowing there’s more beneath the surface of the words I can only barely grasp

I’m reading the Kathasaritsagara now! Reading those kind of collections of tales makes me feel like I’m living among the ancient/medieval villagers of India, an interesting perspective shift to say the least

I wonder if it’s all those variables named with single letter and abbreviations, so annoying to code review

Think of it dialectically, not in a polar way. So called “good” and “bad” have to come together in one for one to be able to surpass the apparent duality. Any enlightenment, individual or social, should come from the stage after good/bad

This is what the sages will say, on the individual level: it’s not so much good vs bad as useful or not useful (to some end). We need to understand and maybe learn to control what this “end” is. Similar thing with socialism: it’s not class war for the sake of one class winning, but rather abolishing class as a system altogether

Fellow conlanger!

I have met people who are able to do this, and believe that everyone can, already or eventually. Unfortunately though their willingness to do it with me never aligns, so I don’t get to do this much.

Deep engagement in a conversation and a deep conversation are different things I’d say.

Deep engagement to me is when someone starts thinking about your position as their own. One time I asked a store clerk where I can get a shovel in the store. They didn’t have any, but he kept brainstorming with me what I can use as a makeshift shovel or where else I can go to shop for one. It was very engaging and nice to be part of.

One way I can describe a deep conversation is a topic that, when someone starts getting into it, the socialized knee-jerk reaction is to insult them to shut them up (unless you happen to be impassioned about it as well). Think sitcom: some quirky character waxes poetic and the others tell them to can it because the plot must go on.

I guess a deep conversation can be a personal one, although I would maybe categorize that as an intimate conversation rather than deep. Both are conversations that people usually just to ignore, avoid, or tell others to stop because they want to get on with their own lives. Usually deep conversation topics are larger-than-daily-life topics, so that’s probably why

There is so much internal politics, especially in larger companies.

I’m on the team that manages the core functionality of the product, but every other team twists our arms and escalates things all the way to the top-levels just so they can do things in the way they are used to or they just prefer. Apparently the other managers are aiming for promotions so it’s a power grab. Meanwhile, the product turns to shit, my team gets blamed, we lose money, people like me who do the actual work get laid off (thankfully I haven’t yet but idk)

Smaller companies are nicer, but they still have politics. Honestly I’ve been in cooperatives too and there is still some politics. I guess it’s just the capitalist alienation between workers

Tolkien was just retelling legends, folktales, fairy tales, children’s bedtime stories etc. He did piece them together to create extended connected lore, but not everything gets cleanly explained away in this kind of worldbuilding technique.

So really imo Tom Bombadil is just some contrivance of Tolkien to make the story feel more like some old fairy tale.